Free Zbigniew Brzezinski

The other day I made a post in which I called Zbigniew Brzezinski an appeasement monkey because of remarks he made counseling people not to be "provocative" of sensitive Muslims' feelings. I regret making this assessment, because it became clear to me that he was being held by Muslim terrorists.

I feel that it was wrong for me to imply he was a quisling, and providing comfort to our adversaries. It appears that a new video of Brzezinski has surfaced, and his life may be in danger. It looks as though Jihadi John wants to butcher him like a Christmas goose.

His gray suit has been replaced by an orange jumpsuit. In the background is the Syrian desert. His eyes are full of fear. However, his hair is perfect.

If we do not meet ISIS' demands, I worry that Jihadi John is going to lop off Zbigniew's head, and then kick it around in the dirt, and laugh at us and our puny republic of free persons and nuclear-tipped submarine-launched cruise missiles.

Keep Zbigniew in your prayers. Believe in your heart that our good intentions will mollify and placify those misunderstood 'folks' that would otherwise send ten-year-old girls to the market strapped with explosives.

And Mika, if for some awful reason you do lose your daddy, remember this: I will be your daddy.

#BringbackZbigniew