Olympics Fever?

See your doctor.

I don't understand the fascination with women's gymnastics. Look at this team. Do any of these individuals look like women to you?

Simone Biles is nineteen years old, and stands four feet nine inches tall. She looks like a garden gnome. Like all the other members of the team, she looks like she suffers from facial dysmorphism.

Gabby Douglas is twenty, and stands nearly five feet tall. She's practically statuesque, by gymnastics standards. Like Biles, her face looks like it was sandwiched between plates of a hydraulic press. And like Biles, her routine consists of thrashing around on the floor and doing lots of flips. It's a performance that has no grace or style, just raw power.

Laurie Hernandez is sixteen years old. Technically this is considered an age of physical sexual maturity, but she seems arrested in an earlier developmental stage. Her huge eyes and round head give her the appearance of a baby.

Aly Raisman has a very thick neck. She is nearly tall enough not to be confused with a dwarf, but is still a womanlet.

At least the male gymnasts conform to a general aesthetic. The only use anyone would have for a retired gymnast like Gabby Douglas would be to create a new master race of mutant super-gymnasts.

Either that, or a feminist reboot of Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs. Women today need to be good role models for little girls who are gaining interest in mining and metalworking. Gabby Douglas would be Doc, because they need to show that black, humanlike creatures can also be physicians. Get a handsome man utterly lacking in agency to damsel, like Chris Pine. Practically writes itself.